So this week, I got told on for saying that I wouldn't be able to attend my boss's ex-boss's summer barbecue. On a Saturday, 2 hours away from my apartment. By bus.
A coworker asked me if I was planning on going, and I said, no, probably not, explaining about the whole Saturday/2 hour/bus thing.
So what does she do? She emails my boss who is OUT ON MATERNITY LEAVE and TELLS ON ME. My boss proceeds to email me to pressure me to go, and I have to awkwardly explain why I can't (or rather, won't). But come on - are you fucking kidding me? Are we thirteen? I mean, you're like 33 and married, lady - and you're going to run and TELL ON ME to the boss-lady?!
Also, where in my original offer letter does it state that I have to sit on a smelly bus for 2 hours on a Saturday to attend an awkward barbecue IN JERSEY held by a man I NO LONGER WORK FOR where I would be a.) the only person there under the age of 30 and b.) the ONLY person there without a boyfriend, husband, or several young children in tow?! I don't remember that particular clause.
Just kidding. But seriously, what will I get if I devote yet another day of my week to my job by going all the way to the middle of nowhere to suck up to my recent new-mom boss? Am I going to get my recently suspended overtime hours back? (This was my "reward" when I got promoted - working the same amount of hours but for less pay, because now I'm "salaried." Nice, huh?) No? Oh, I'm just going to get awkwardly ogled by aforementioned boss's ex-boss in front of his wife? And subtly criticized by my boss, who apparently thinks I can't wait until I'm married and in my 30s to have a bitchy passive-aggressive mother-in-law? And forced to bounce the small, sticky children of my coworkers on my knee while chugging rum-and-cokes to dull the emotional pain of my life? Methinks I am OUT, my friends. OUT.
Instead, I am going to dinner and movie with my roommate and some of her/my (I think I can call at least one of them "my" at this point) friends, including the guy she used to date but is still obviously in love with and who has never met any of her friends before. Still a tiny bit awkward, but at least we're all hovering around 25 and don't have to hire a babysitter to watch the kids. Also, we're staying in Manhattan. And while I won't get any brownie points at work, I will get to see District 9 which I am SO PSYCHED ABOUT. The reviews look amazing. Maybe I'll try writing one of my own here after I see it - an interesting exercise.
Ok, well, now that I've bitched and moaned about the ridiculous social pressure at work, I should be off to bed (or, to be honest, more browsing of entertainment sites GAH MY LIFE, WHAT AM I DOING WITH IT?). Later.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Kelly Clarkson's weight controversy = ME ENRAGED (and also introspective)
I spend about an hour every day browsing entertainment websites, and my self-esteem and ability to control my feminist rage are both suffering. Our country is seriously out of control.
The primary focus of my rage is the whole Kelly Clarkson thing. Now, I LOVE Kelly Clarkson. Love, love, love her. Seen her in concert three times, have all the albums, etc. But I can admit to the world here on the interwebs that, yes, she has noticeably gained weight. She's looked thinner. Fine. My question - why, oh why, do people on the internet positively hate her for it? And why do these same people feel the need to use her weight gain as an excuse to make hateful comments about all perceived "fat" people, as if being overweight (or simply being perceived as such) is akin to being a terrorist? Why is it that in our culture, fat people (and especially fat women) are villified? What is so awful for not-fat people (as all of these internet posters claim to be) about the existence of not-thin people? And why do we, as a larger society, feed into this culture of hatred and allow it to influence the way we think about ourselves and others?
I'm hardly immune. Reading these articles and blogposts and comments about KC, my rage at the anti-woman nature of the majority of the postings is constantly at war with my own insecurities about my body. While I may "tut tut" and furrow my brow in disgust when one particularly eloquent poster says that he "wouldn't bone that disgusting cow," part of me is also worrying, God, do men look at me and think that, too?! I can admit this: if you called me mean to my face, it would hurt my feelings less than if you called me fat. And that's absurd. That means that I'd rather be a thin person than a nice person. How fucked up is that? And how fucked up is it that I can recognized how fucked up it is, and still feel that way? (Wow, that was DEEP, right? Lol J/k).
No, but seriously. Body image and weight control and obesity are totally out of control in America, we all get that. But this hatred that people feel for others based solely on their BMI...it's taken us to a place where we are saying that obesity isn't just a problem - it's a sin. If you're fat, you're not just fat - you're bad. And if you're a fat woman? You're not just gross and unattractive to men - you're evil. Don't believe me? "The Superficial" guy compared KC to a flesh-eating monster last week. A flesh-eating monster. Yeah, we're doing real well, America.
The primary focus of my rage is the whole Kelly Clarkson thing. Now, I LOVE Kelly Clarkson. Love, love, love her. Seen her in concert three times, have all the albums, etc. But I can admit to the world here on the interwebs that, yes, she has noticeably gained weight. She's looked thinner. Fine. My question - why, oh why, do people on the internet positively hate her for it? And why do these same people feel the need to use her weight gain as an excuse to make hateful comments about all perceived "fat" people, as if being overweight (or simply being perceived as such) is akin to being a terrorist? Why is it that in our culture, fat people (and especially fat women) are villified? What is so awful for not-fat people (as all of these internet posters claim to be) about the existence of not-thin people? And why do we, as a larger society, feed into this culture of hatred and allow it to influence the way we think about ourselves and others?
I'm hardly immune. Reading these articles and blogposts and comments about KC, my rage at the anti-woman nature of the majority of the postings is constantly at war with my own insecurities about my body. While I may "tut tut" and furrow my brow in disgust when one particularly eloquent poster says that he "wouldn't bone that disgusting cow," part of me is also worrying, God, do men look at me and think that, too?! I can admit this: if you called me mean to my face, it would hurt my feelings less than if you called me fat. And that's absurd. That means that I'd rather be a thin person than a nice person. How fucked up is that? And how fucked up is it that I can recognized how fucked up it is, and still feel that way? (Wow, that was DEEP, right? Lol J/k).
No, but seriously. Body image and weight control and obesity are totally out of control in America, we all get that. But this hatred that people feel for others based solely on their BMI...it's taken us to a place where we are saying that obesity isn't just a problem - it's a sin. If you're fat, you're not just fat - you're bad. And if you're a fat woman? You're not just gross and unattractive to men - you're evil. Don't believe me? "The Superficial" guy compared KC to a flesh-eating monster last week. A flesh-eating monster. Yeah, we're doing real well, America.
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